You Know You’ve Been in Vietnam Too Long When…

1. You wear your motorcycle helmet when you aren’t riding your motorbike
2. You say “Oi!” instead of “Oh!”
3. Red lights mean “You can slow down a little, if you want to”
4. You get pissed off when the bar charges you $3 for a gin and tonic
5. The food groups consist of: Fortifieds, Vegetables, Meat, Rice, Milk, and Street Food
6. You don’t think twice when throwing an elbow at an old lady’s face as you push your way to the front of the line
7. You see a pig strewn across the back of a motorbike and think “That’s a good-looking Honda Wave”
8. Your mind doesn’t even register car horns
9. Your friday night plans include “raging” until midnight, and then going home since the bars are all closed
10. When anyone even begins to talk to you on the street, you immediately cut them off with “No I don’t want a motorbike ride!”

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